Do you ever think of a certain moment

you were really happy?

When you wouldn't stop throwing my socks at me.

"Go make your mac n cheese so you won't be crabby making our fort"

Talking til 6 in the morning with your boyfriend. Waking up at noon to eat with your friends. Getting ice cream in 14 degree weather. Going with your friends to see a play, coming back to your dorm to ruin mac n cheese, building a fort with your roommate, laying in said fort with your friends and watching funny videos late at night.........................

Life isn't as bad as people say it is yeah?

It takes my breath away, what happened to it all?

Was it nothing? Did we just fall apart to the point where our relationship would have to be rebuilt? Does it need to be mended?

Is it that you don't love me anymore? You found someone else to replace me? Or are you as afraid to try again as I am? Does it enter your mind? Because I think about it all the time.

Did you not think of me as your other half, the way I thought of you?

Is there someone else taking your time, taking your better judgement, taking your memories?

Do you miss it? Do you miss me? There was enough history that qualified us as something special, enough to justify how I feel.

Do you need someone to pull you out of what's apparently consuming you? Or do you like the hold that's been put on you.

Maybe you don't remember what it used to be like. Maybe you don't remember the times I helped you through, the things we experienced, cried through together.

I'd understand. I just want to know why it is always on my mind. Why does it actually hurt my stomach when I think about it more than I should. I know the answer, but it always hurts to admit that we had something worth losing.

I'll try to rebuild what we had when I know your silence won't hurt anymore.

yeah i can be the girl that cares about stupid things sometimes. i spend my life not bringing up little things because i don't want everything to crumble. but sometimes i care.

UREC.... Ke$ha styl3 :D :D

Hannah and I hit up UREC today. It was so fun! We jammed to Kesha on the way there (yes we coordinated songs because we're nerds), jammed to Kesha while we rode the bikes, jammed to Kesha while we ran a mile on the treadmills, and ... nah we talked on the way back.

It was actually fun! We went at like 10 something and there was hardly anyone there, which is what we like. We're going to start going more and I'm really excited! I really want to get into better shape.... Kesha will help us!! :D :D

When I don't feel like sleeping...

I like to pretend I'm at the dentist..

Or act like a horse....

or spaz.....

or look smug.....

or act like I can't see the screen......

or look just.... weird.

Prayerful

Today at small group our theme for the night was "Prayerful".

We basically talked about praying: how to, when to, what about, tips on how to help your prayers, etc. It was pretty awesome because it's a topic that is really relevant.

Here are some of the things we talked about concerning praying:

-When something good happens, praise God through prayer.

On the same note, when something bad happens, pray. (that's usually not an issue, kind of a no brainer)

- Emma said she has a symbol, a butterfly ring for example, to remind you of God and that reminds you to pray.

- Writing down your prayers.

- Getting a devotional to help inspire ideas of what to pray for.

-Notice things around you and pray about them. Pray every morning you wake up.. it's not a given that you will.... it's a blessing.

- Even listening to Christian songs sometimes can help remind you to pray.

So yeah. We talked about a ton of things and it was just a really great small group tonight. It gave me suggestions and things to think about. Yay.

"There is no Rock like our God." 1 Sam 2:2