Not knowing if I'll be in my house a year from now.
And selfishly, that is what saddens me the most. I mean, I know that I should be more concerned about my father finding a job, but I trust that the Lord will help us. We'll all stick together and pull through.
But this whole my house thing is something that is just going to happen if we move. It will no longer be the house I have lived in since I was born. It won't be my front yard that never could grow grass, the sidewalk taken so many times to lead me to the big red door, the spot next to it that Bo always layed in, the pineapple wall paper, the green carpet in our family room, my little room. That won't be mine. It will change. I don't know how to explain it, it just hurts.
Aside from that, which is just, I don't even want to think about too much, my little brother is going to be in the middle of high school. I feel so bad for him. And my mom has friends here, it just. Ugh. I don't know.
And then just my dad. I feel really bad for him. My family just needs prayer, for our happiness, for my dad looking for a job, for us to not give up and to keep relying on God. I do, for me though it's just I'm sad about moving. Which is something that might be unavoidable. And I'm just going to be sad about it for a little while. No one said life was easy.